This week i listened to my friend talk about himself. I would ask him questions and he would respond. I noticed that he does not give a sincere response unless it is something he is passionate about. he would be much more willing to have a long converstaion or response to a question when i asked about something he liked. I waited and listened untill after he was finished answering my question before i began to think about a new one. i thought that it was more kind to actually listen to his response and pay attention instead of thinking of something else to say. Also from listening to his entire response i could easily base my next question off of what he had just said keeping passionate topics alive. i realized that you can have questiions prepared but you have to stray away from the prepared material once you start opening and interesting topic. It would be pointless to just start getting into a deep good conversation and then switching back to a question that you had prepared that could be very off topic. so it is very helpful to pay attention to what the person is saying and base your next question, prompt, or comment off of the material they were just telling you.
I also found it very helpful to read body langauge throughout the converstion. it made it very easy to tell when he was passionate about a subject or topic because he would smile or his voice pitch would change. Also he would start talking faster or his eyes would light up. It was obvious to tell when he didnt feel very connected to a question because he would give vague emotionless responses. Listening and reading body language are very important in keeping a conversation alive. If you get into a groove and are talking about a passionate subject the converstion flows much more smoothly and is much more enjoyable.
I have to agree with you that people often do talk much more about areas they are passionate about. I believe this is because they are much more knowledgeable, interested, and comfortable with those topics. I know I am that way as well. It is hard to talk about something you don't know well or don't think about too often.
ReplyDeleteYou are right on! While you might have prepared questions for a conversation, you must adapt to the flow of the conversation once it begins. I had an interview today in which I had a conversation with my interviewer. He asked me questions, and I asked him questions. Before the interview, I prepared a list of about ten questions to ask him. However, once we began talking, I ended up asking follow-up questions to his answers, and I only used about half of the answers that I had prepared ahead of time. It sounds like you had a good conversation with your friend and learned more about his passions. Did you think about using some of the techniques that we learned in class?
ReplyDelete